SSWC09 Declaration of Riptasticness!

Rad Ross Schnell by T. Herb Belrose

Rad Ross Schnell by T. Herb Belrose

The results are official, and Radical Ross Schnell is the new SS WORLD CHAMPION! Ross finished the impossibly impossible course of radical impossibility in a whopping sixtyish seconds and blurtyfive minutes!

“I couldn’t have done without the help of my spirit guide, Terry Bradshaw,” said Rad.

Here are the results in the men’s category:

1. Rad Ross Schnell

2. Chi Chi Rodriguez

3. JORDAN (Jordan was seriously ripping today, even while battling a stomach flu).


Heather Irmiger by T. Herb Belrose

In the women’s category, there was some fantastic SS battle action, with reports of at least six knock-em-out drag-em-down catfights on the course. The meanest lady of all, Heather Irmiger, crossed the finish line with blood under her fingernails and a string of freshly assembled teeth around her neck.

Official SSWC09 Women’s Results:

1. Heather Irmiger

2. Harriet Tubman (not the fastest girl, but she had some serious secret shortcuts assembled).

3. Jacquie Phelan

7 Responses to “SSWC09 Declaration of Riptasticness!”

  1. Jacquie Phelan! Woo hoo does she ever stop ripping it up. Rock on Alice B. Toeclips!

  2. wow.
    I only raced a half of the race course…(pretty tiring hike-a-bike climb, but hearing the singing a few switchbacks below and riding with JOE MurrAY and Curtis Inglis perked me up).
    Surely some mistake.
    I told every single person I saw “I only did half” (plus, I didn’t go under that lovely bicycle-frame banner, for fear of such an error)
    So, let the record show, some very deserving woman (Rebecca? Sabina? Mary? SOME GNARLY kid in her thirties!!!) has third place . BUT: weren’t we just ‘counting’ top rider, and everyone else “did well”?
    ya, keeping results below Tattoo-getters means: the beginning of the end.
    “Dude! I was 250th, I KNOW IT!!!” etc.
    Heaven help us.
    Chad, Annie, Max, et al…it

  3. Chris Marenghi Says:

    Wacky Jacquie does it again!!! Oh yeah, congrats to the others…

  4. […] more here and here. Posted in Racing, Uncategorized , Tagged Rad Ross, SINGLESPEED CHAMPS 2010, Spoke Magazine […]

  5. […] again by winning the pedaling portion for the dudes and claiming his traditional winner’s tattoo. Of course, he had the help of one Terry Bradshaw, so his win was perhaps inevitable. (Damn, I looked for a Steeler card at the sign-in and didn’t […]

  6. […] Full results are over here […]

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